On peace.

Staycation.

In theory, it's a great idea. You generate a list of errands to do, stuff to see, cultural activities to experience, cocktails to drink. Instead you spend your time on the phone, on hold with Verizon, trying to combat two weeks of technical difficulty in connecting to you, yeah YOU...the internet. Most folks have always known me to be a pillar of calm.  Nothing normally rattles me and I tend to tackle problems (at work at least) with a clear and objective head. But there are three entities that have succeeded in sodomizing my inner peace this week: the MTA, the Antichrist f*cktard who lives below me, and Verizon. I am not a proponent of violence but if all three were humans, I'd hire someone to stab them in the carotid.

I'll spare you the harrowing details, but I am now the proud owner of legitimate interwebs and I'm posting from the comfort of my sectional. For the remainder of this staycation, I will watch Hulu, eat pie, and do online research on lawful ways to evict or psychologically traumatize said f*cktard.

Namaste.